Day 4
Today is pretty uneventful. Blah keeps bugging me to spend time with him, but I keep putting him off. I'd pretty much rather saw my fingers off with a plastic spoon. My friend DJ that lives in Boston sent me a present today, a freakin Louis Vuitton purse! It was a belated birthday present, and he said since he has never given me a birthday present in the 7 years i've known him that he's going to make it all up with this one. He's like "now you have to go to the club and drag it on the floor like you a millionaire." I'm the lowest maintenance girl ever, so me getting a Louis is like a crackhead getting an 8ball. It just doesn't happen.
Ok, does this seem ummm inappropriate to you? my girl has this boyfriend who we'll call... GQ (cuz he thinks he is). Well, they've been together like 7-8 years, living together & everything. Well like 5 years ago he cheated on her, they worked through it blah blah blah. On New Years Eve, the 3 of us, and GQ's nephew who's our age went out to a strip club. Well, I started drinking long before anyone else so I was pretty tipsy. I kiss a couple strippers, get a couple dances, whatever... it was a fun night. Then we drop my girl off at home because she was havin no part of it, and we go to this party. Well, at the party I go to the bathroom and i'm fixin my make up with GQ walks in and shuts the door behind him. He's like tryin to make small talk and I'm thinkin, WTF are you doin in here? Then he goes in to kiss me. He was the DD, so he wasn't drunk. Of course i'm like ummm NO! So, then he tells all these people that werent there about how i kissed strippers and got dances and shit. Like they need to know my shit! So now, he's been calling and e-mailing me a lot more than usual. Today he's saying how we need to go out drinking when I'm back in town. He makes it very clear that he wants it to just be him and I. I thought that was kind of weird. I was like fuck that! why? so you could tell eeeeeeverybody what happens, and i can hear about it for the next year? I'm cool. He was like "hey, blame your girl for that. I just told her. she told EEEEEEEEEEEVVVVVVEERYBODY else. I thought I could trust her. guess I was wrong. so that means it'll have to be just you and me when you come out to visit." I told him we can all go out, and i'll drink but i'm not getting DRUNK. he goes "it's cool, it can just be you and me, ain't nobody gotta find out about what happens. I'll keep it a secret. and I'm gonna get you fu-FUCKED up!!!" OK... is it just me, or is something really wrong with this picture???
Anyway, tonight I think I'm going to have a Netflix night with my cuddle bitch, which really is a term of endearment ;) Tomorrow I'll go to a club, and Sunday I'll repent for all my sins, or just sleep... whatever works. =) With all this frustration built up, I need to get laid! Well, have a good weekend. Drink, party, dance, screw... do what you do. adios.
Time to vent
It's Friday. Finally. I don't know why, but last night everything just hit me as really fuckin irritating. I mean, like, I was even thinking about shit that already happened and was getting irritated about it all over again. Cop's wife came over with the babies, and I think that's what started it. Now, don't get me wrong, I LOVE those little ones to death. They are so precious, and I love being around them. But last night I was already irritated when she came over, (Cop had left to do some errands) and she just fuckin lets herself in with the key he gave her. I was like ummmm hi. Like bitch, YOU DONT LIVE HERE! FUCKIN KNOCK! So she comes in with the 2 crying babies (one is 3 y/o, and the other is 2 months) and just plops all her shit in the living room (that I just cleaned). Then, her phone rings so she leaves the 2 crying kids in the living room and goes in Cop's room to fuckin gossip with her one of her girlfriends. So i go pick up the baby, and try to get him to stop crying and I was rubbing the other ones back. So after like 15 minutes she comes in and is like "oh, you don't have to do that." Ok, why dont i just be like you and leave 2 FUCKIN CRYING KIDS ALONE??? AAAAAAHHHHHHH! So i went to my room to be alone with my irritated self, and she knocks on my door "are you ok??" no bitch, i'm not ok. LEAVE ME ALONE! You're probably thinking, damn, what a bitch! I'm really not, this is very rare for me but my anxiety level went up so high knowing she was coming, then her entrance just sent me through the roof. After a while, Cop came home and he calls me out for dinner, so we're eating (the kids are sleeping), and every time Cop is talking directly to me about something, she interrupts and makes him talk to her. So i'm basically just trying to take deep breaths and stay calm. After dinner, Cop is cleaning up the dishes and her and I are sitting at the table and he whispers in my ear for me to get this R&B mix CD (
great sex music) that he can put on while she takes a bubble bath that he's going to run for her (I gave him the idea because he wanted to do something nice for her). So when he whispers that to me, you should've seen her face. She looked like he grabbed me and starting fucking me on the table. She was like "Okaaaaaaay! What the fuck was that about???" So I get up to get the cd, put it in his bathroom and go back to my room away from the fuckin antichrist. About an hour later he comes in, and gives me a high 5 for the bath idea, I said "Who's your bitch?" he said "You are!" and we both go to bed.
Ok, here's what I was thinking about last night that is still irritating me. I explained Marine in my first post. Well, we were together for a month, and it was fuckin amazing. He lives 8 hours away, so it was all over the phone, and we had planned a weekend for him to come up and spend with me. Over the phone we talked about everything! He told me I was the one, we talked about marriage, kids, he asked me my ring size, everything... lots of phone sex too ;) He even sent me a letter, with pictures, and his dog tag that he wore in the middle east! Which was a very big deal. So the weekend comes, he gets here on a Friday night and we agreed (I'm not sure why) to not have sex on the first night he was here. So we kissed a lot, did some fondling, but then decided sleep was probably a good idea. In the morning we wake up start kissing, more touching, have oral sex, then we get up to have breakfast. We had a great day together, it was so much fun! Then Saturday night comes around and Cop and his wife ask us to bbq and drink with them. We didn't know how to say no, so we agree. We start drinking a little too early, so we were buzzed before we ate. After we ate we started playing quarters. Well, little did I know, Cop thought it would be really funny to get me reeeeeeeeeeally drunk. I usually have a really high tolerance, but that night was different. The last shot I remember taking was my third, and I was told I took 11. So, after a while, I'm clearly on auto pilot and Cop pulls out the video camera and starts asking me if I would kiss his wife. Now, I've kissed a few girls before, no big deal. I'm straight as an arrow and very secure with my sexuality, so who cares. To me, kissing a girl is NO BIG DEAL. So, (keep in mind i don't remember any of this, I was told everything the next day) I said yeah, i'd kiss her. Then, still being video taped, he's telling me to hit on her, and asking me how and where i'd kiss her. Well, she's getting all embarrassed, and Marine is getting pissed, I don't know what the fuck is going on, and obviously Cop is the only one who thinks it's funny. So, nothing ever happened with it, no kiss, nothing. It was all talk. Later, Marine asks Cop's wife why nobody told him I'm a lesbian. HAHAHA!!! She was like um because she's not! She's drunk, go talk to her. Well, hello! I'm in no condition to talk, I think that's pretty clear by now. He comes in and tries to have a serious talk with me anyway. So, needless to say, I really don't remember what was said. I do remember talking about what happened between Cop and I in high school (probably not a good subject to talk about with Marine), and I remember him saying he should probably leave, and me crying. Other than that... i draw a total blank. So the next morning I wake up at like 8:00 like heyyyyy WTF??? Why isn't he here??? So I try to call him, no answer. I lay there for a while, then try again at 8:30, nothing. So I go wake up Cop and I was like dude... he fuckin left! He's like WHAAAAAAAAT??? I was like yeah, WTF HAPPENED LAST NIGHT??? So, he tells me the story and I'm so fuckin embarrassed. Like, OMG, I can't believe I did that. So Cop was like, "well it's my fault, you were getting drunk really fast and I thought it was funny, so I just kept making you take more and more shots." I was too upset about Marine leaving to be mad at Cop yet. So during that day I tried calling him numerous times and he wouldn't take my calls, I tried text messaging him, nothing. I figured he went to his parents house that live 2 hours away. So on top of my hangover, the fact that I'm not exactly clear on what happened, he left in the middle of the night after driving almost 10 hours to get here, and now he's ignoring me. i was a freakin WRECK! Not like a fender bender, but like a fuckin 50 car pile up. My heart was broken beyond belief. So Monday rolls around I get up, dont take a shower, no make up, didnt give a fuck... get to work and what's the first thing my boss asks??? How was your weekend with Marine? I just burst into tears, and she's like omg, honey, go home and get some rest. So I come home and try to call him again, and again, and again. Cop's wife is there so I apologize to her for what happened, and for making her uncomfortable. She said it was totally fine, that she was mad at Cop for making me take all those shots when everyone knew I shouldn't have. So she tries calling and text messaging Marine for me, and he wont take hers either. So then at like 3pm he sends me a text message that says "hey. you need to relax. you didn't do anything wrong. it's me, being with you just didn't feel right. i'll call you in a couple days." *poof* all my feelings of sadness, guilt, regret all turned to anger. I need to relax?!?!? What the fuck did you just say? Fuck you! You leave in the middle of the night, I have no idea what happened, then ignore me for 2 days and I need to relax? OH HELL NO! So I didn't reply, didnt call, nothing. I was just basically like fuck him. So the week passes and on Thursday night at like 11 he text messages me saying he can't talk, but he can text message. He said sorry for hurting me, that wasn't his intention, but that he just didn't feel the way he thought he would when he was with me and didn't know what to do. I told him he could've fuckin sat me down and talked me to me about it when we were sober. He said he was afraid of hurting me. I was like oh ok, so you leave in the middle of the night, when we're both drunk so I don't even know what happened, and then ignore me for 2 days, THAT wouldn't hurt me. You fuck! He asked if we could be friends and I was like yeah, sure. So the next day, I packed up all the shit he gave me and sent it to him, dog tag and all. I wrote a very nice note saying i was very honored to have these things, but didn't feel right keeping them because they are things he should have to give to a future girlfriend. And that was that, haven't heard from him since. This all happened 3 weeks ago, and I'm still irritated about it. I'm so over him, because that was such a bitch thing to do. He didn't have the fuckin balls to talk to me about what he was feeling, then leaves when i'm so drunk i don't know my own name, sends me a text message 2 days later, then another text message like 3 days after that. Sorry, but I need a man that has some fuckin balls and doesn't fuckin run and hide like a little bitch. Wow, surprisingly, I feel better after letting all that out. *sigh of relief*
Ok... time to get some work done.
Just a quick request to gum chewers out there... CHEW WITH YOUR FUCKING MOUTH CLOSED! Jesus! That's so fuckin obnoxious!
Day 3
It's Thursday morning, wish it was Friday. Actually no, I wish it was Saturday, because then I would be at home in bed. Chester has already e-mailed me 4 times this morning and it's only 8:50! He needs to fuckin call his wife, Jesus. Cop said I need to take him up on his Vegas offer then tell him I'm on the rag when we're there, I was like yeah... so he can just ask for head? He's like "just tell him you have oral herpes!" haha! Now that's funny! Cop's wife is coming today to stay for the weekend... if only you could see the excitement on my face. :| Riiiiiiiiiiiiight.
So, totally off the subject of what I normally talk about, I just ran across this guy's blog and it's fuckin awesome. He has some great stories , check it out:
TJ's Place. Now this guy is pure comedy, you gotta check this out:
beer and rap.
Well, today was really fuckin lame. I should be getting some Netflix movies in today, so, um... yeah, that's exciting. Hasta luego.
Day 2
Chester started e-mailing me first thing this morning, telling me I need to go back home for a visit so he can convince me to stay and we can be together. Riiiiiiiiiiiiight. I told him that Mama's Boy always suspected that I cheated on him with Chester and he said I should've when I had the chance, it would've given him a reason to make the accusations. Sorry jackass, I don't cheat! He also said he wants to take me to Vegas, he'll pay for everything. I still think he's married.
I sent a care package to Army today in Iraq. I talked to him the other day and he seemed really down. Hopefully this package will cheer him up a little. Everyone told me to send him a Playboy, but you can't send porn into a muslim country. Damn!
Cop's wife is getting on my last nerve. I swear she has multiple personalities. She's so fuckin 2 faced! She's so sweet to me like everything's fine, but then when I turn around and she's all pissed telling him stupid shit like he's not allowed to hug me. Last night him and I were eating dinner and he tells me not to tell her we ate dinner together because she'll get mad. WTF??? She spends like 3-4 nights a week at our apartment, and it's a little too much for me. When she's there, him and I basically have to argue the entire time so she won't think we get along too well, or that we're too close. I don't want to be with him, but I want my best friend back. Needless to say, the few nights a week she's not there are great.
Ok, time to get some work done...
Day 1
I'm just basically going to stick to my love/sex life here, going into anything else would drive you crazy! I'm convinced that my 20's are the most confusing and difficult years of my life. I'm 24, and single. Starting to think about settling down... but can't seem to find anyone I'd want to settle down with. I'll give you a key to start off with:
Cop - my best friend for 8 years, met and started having sex with him in high school. very hot! he's married now with 2 little ones, but lives with me. he and his wife are separated, but trying to work things out. Last time we had sex was about 4 months ago. more painful than satisfying, "it's" a little too big for me. he's about to be a cop though, and as you'll see i'm a HUGE sucker for uniform.
Marine - we were friends in HS, lost touch for 7 years, I found him (he's a marine now) and we became a couple within a few days. The first weekend he came to see me that all fell apart, and we haven't spoken since. we had oral sex, but not the real thing. we were together a month. i knew it was too good to be true.
Borracho (means drunk in spanish) - no good, was with him for 8 months when I was 18-19 and he still always seems to track me down. Sex was great, if you don't mind a crazy, violent, coke snorting, alcoholic.
Chester (the molester) - dated him... correction had sex with him for several months when i was 19-20, he was 29-30. again, the sex was great but i wanted more than just sex and he was quite content with it, until i found someone new, then he decides he wants to be together. i'm convince he's married, but can't prove it. we still e-mail all the time, and he still insists that he's in love with me and wants to settle down.
Mama's boy - left Chester for this one. was with him for 2 years, loved him to death but he was the biggest ASS ever! such a cocky, self absorbed, jerk! great sex, but lousy boyfriend. And the biggest mama's boy known to man! we still talk occasionally too... he swears he's changed and i'm the only one for him, blah blah blah...
Army - met this guy online like 7 years ago and became very close, we've talked on the phone, but never met in person. He's in the army now and in Iraq. =( He's 23, and I love him to death. So genuine, and sweet. We say that we're soulmates, and a lot of the time I actually believe we are.
Blah - boring boring boring! met him when i first moved here, pretty good looking, but he has NO personality. can't take a joke, just really bland, and annoying. we went out a few times, kissed... and that's about the extent of it. he still bugs me to spend time with him but i have other really important things to do like spot clean the carpet under my furniture.
Cuddle bitch - very very nice guy, met him when i first moved here as well. not the best looking guy in the world but his lips, and fingers are amazing! i often refer to him as my "cuddle bitch" because we've never had sex, and i'm not really interested in sex with him. although last time he was over i felt his package and it was quite adequate.
Fireman - a fireman and HOT HOT HOT as fiuh! one of my older sister's best friends. he's 33, and we've had sex a few times. he has a girlfriend now, so I wish him the best.
FBI - this guy is amazing, 33 and an FBI agent. talk about hot! another one of my older sister's best friends. I've known him since I was born, and he was like 10 years old. we had sex for the first time on my 23rd b'day, and several times in the past year. if i'm being honest... the sex is probably about a 2 out of 10, but he gets an E for effort. He's great looking, and has the FBI thing going for him so that makes up for it. ahhh power is such a freakin turn on!
These are the guys that I currently talk to, and will be referring to the most in my blogs. I've slept with roughly 20 guys, give or take a few, starting when i was 14, is that bad??? These are the ones that are still around.
Ok, that should be enough to start off... time to close up at work so I can get home and make dinner for Cop.
