A New Beginning
It's been quite a while since I've written anything on here, which is weird because SO much has been going on the past several months. I've met my better half. My love. He is amazing in every way, and I become a better person every day just for knowing him. We met in May on Myspace, met in person shortly after that, and have been together since June. I was really excited, and hesitant at first because of everything I've been through... but I could tell from the first time we came face to face that he's different, much different. He's a perfect gentleman, so respectful, funny, smart, handsome, opens all my doors, pulls out my chairs, insists on paying for everything, very family oriented, loves kids, patient, understanding, open-minded, very easy going, easy to get along with, goes to school and works full time, he's out on his own, has two cars, The only speedbump is his ex. They were together for four years and broke up in April. So that didn't leave much time between her and I. Well, she's very young... only 19 (he's 21), and her behavior definitely reflects that. She calls him just about every day with a new drama story, saying she's going to kill herself, she needs rehab, she got beat up... blah blah blah. So, being that he was with her for four years until 6 months ago... he feels obligated to help her. One evening we had plans and then he says, oh my friend is coming into town and wants to hang out, so maybe he can come with us? i said cool, that's fine with me. Then he said "oh HE doesn't want to go with us, but wants to go out." Basically saying, HE doesn't want to go with ME. Then I heard him talking to his "friend" on the phone, and it was very obviously a female on the other end. I got upset that he was lying (not that he was talking to a girl, but lying about talking to one) so I called him out on it... he got mad at me for accusing him of lying... i explained to him that if it is a girl, even his ex, i don't care, just be honest. Then he promised he would take me out the following day, and left to go meet his "friend". He called me a few hours later and was in the car with a bunch of his boys, and said they were going out and he would come over after that. We didn't bring that incident up again. Then a couple weeks later he came over and was acting really weird, wouldn't get ready for bed, wouldn't take his shoes off... so i had to pry out of him what was going on and he ended up telling me that he had missed school the Thursday before and that he went up to see her and help her because her dad beat her up. And he said he spent the day with her trying to help her find a place to live, meanwhile I thought he was at school all day and never would've known any different. He also told me that I was right that night that his "friend" came to town, it was his ex, and they went to dinner. He said he felt really really guilty #1 because he lied to me, and #2 because she was trying to convince him that they should get back together and he actually considered it for a minute. So he said that I deserve better than him and that he lied to me, and I shouldn't love him because he's not worthy of the love that I give him... blah blah blah. I'm a very forgiving person, almost to a fault, so I thanked him for being honest and told him that I appreciated the fact that he told me these things knowing that I would never find out, and he could've completely gotten away with it. He said "yeah, but i still lied to you." i asked him if he had sex with her. He looked completely surprised, and was like "NO!" i said, "well then? what's the big deal? You had dinner with her, and took her to the hospital when her dad beat her up. Yeah, you lied, yeah, you should've been honest... but you were honest now and I hope you know that you don't have to hide this shit from me anymore. I'm not jealous, I'm not gonna get pissed, nag, bitch, or give you guilt trips. I love you. I trust you. If that changes, we'll talk... until then, just be honest with me and we're good." This whole talk took over 2 hours and I really just wanted to get some from the beginning of the night so after I said that I was like "Ok, now can I get some??" He looked really surprised and was like "WHAT?!?! I don't deserve this, this isn't right!" I told him if he wanted to see me get pissed, he should keep his pants on... otherwise take them off. So, we had a great make-up session, and a good night's sleep. And that was that. He spent the entire weekend with my family last weekend... brothers, sisters, parents, in-laws... and he came out alive, and they all loved him. So I really think this is going somewhere good, there will be bumps in the road, but that's to be expected. What fun would it be without the bumps anyway?
