Mistake
I think I made a mistake by moving here. Maybe not, I don't know. But right now that's exactly how I'm feeling. I don't like it here, at all. I've been so depressed ever since I got here. I keep telling myself it's just because I don't have a job, or an apartment yet, and I really hope that's the case. I think living with my brother has a lot to do with it. Ever since I got here he's been ragging on me about not having a job, starting the very first day I came. HE was the one that said "Oh yeah, move in with us... stay with us through the holidays so you can take your time and find a job you'll really like." I get here and he's pressuring me to take anything I can get. Ever since I got here he's decided to work from home, so he's on his computer all day. He wakes me up every day at 7am for nothing, because he gets on his computer so I can't even get online to look for a job or check my e-mail, so how the fuck am I supposed to find one? He gets mad when I watch TV, he gets mad when I sleep, he gets mad if I sit on the couch and wait for a chance to get on the computer, but he won't even let me get on the computer to look for a job! So, I get up at 7am, and clean. I can't tell you how many times I've cleaned this fuckin house in the past week. I'm basically the house bitch. I clean everything, I cook dinner, I do the dishes after I cook, I do the dishes after they eat breakfast and lunch (even if I don't eat with them), I help his wife with their laundry, I buy all my own food (which they help themselves to) and I even cook them dinner with it, I pay for myself every time we go anywhere, I let my brother use my moving truck for a couple trips to the dump and I paid the extra milage, I took care of their sick puppy all weekend while they were out of town, and spent $140 on his puppy at the Vet (which he hasn't mentioned, repaid, or even thanked me for). I never get so much as a Thank you for any of it, and yet, he STILL acts like me being here is a fuckin inconvenience to them. So, basically my bank account is running thinner and thinner, I don't have a job yet because I can't look for one while he's here, and he just makes me feel like shit for not having one yet after only 1 week. Last night the 3 of us were sitting watching TV, my sister in law and I were folding their laundry, and my brother was just watching TV. The puppy kept scratching at the door to go out so my sister in law told my brother to let him out. He said no, and told me to do it. She was like "No, it's your dog, you need to let him out." So after like 10 minutes he gets up, yells at me about how fuckin lazy I am, and I better get a job soon because my "free ride" is just about up. This caused a huge fight between him and my sister in law, and everybody went to bed angry. God I miss Sacramento.
5 Comments:
WHOA!!! What the hell happened?? Holy smokes! When did your brother turn into King Crank? That sucks major ass in a big way.
I'd feel like I made a mistake too if I was getting razzed right after i got there. Geeez! Sounds like he's not really helping you out at all.
Again...that sucks. I feel bad for you.
Do you stand up for yourself around him? I mean, did you snap back at him with all those points you just wrote?
No, I didn't and probably won't ever snap back at him. He's an extremely confrontational person, not in a violent way, he just loves to argue, and he NEVER backs down even if he knows he's wrong. I'm the opposite, i absolutely hate arguing, and will avoid confrontation at all cost. So even if I approached him with this calmly, he wouldn't listen, he would still turn it into a huge arguement, because that's what he does. So, now i'm just afraid I'm going to accept the first offer I get, just to get a job and get out of here and end up living in the ghetto again because I didn't hold out for a good job... which I'm trying to do, but I can't take much more of this.
Do you have any other options? Other relatives?
My sister in law doesn't say anything until my brother says something fucked up to me, which is why they got in a fight last night. She just stays completely out of it, because she hates arguing just as much as I do and doesn't want to get in the middle.
The only other relative I have here is my other brother who I would never live with because #1, they live up in the middle of the mountains (ever seen Deliverence?), #2 I don't like his girlfriend, and #3 all they do is fight and scream at eachother. So, he's not an option.
sorry, elizabeth. it sucks to hear that things aren't too great. i'm sure they will get a lot better once you get a job and move out. don't let this get you down. :)
my only real suggestion is this: stop being so nice. it's obvious that they don't appreciate it, so don't waste your time trying to make them happy by doing their dishes and caring for their dog and shit like that. you'll waste all this time and energy and it won't get you anywhere... in fact, you'll probably end up being more hurt and frustrated. so quit being so nice!
good luck with the job hunt. try going to the library and using the computers there to do a job hunt. it might be less stressful than looking for jobs at your brother's place.
take care! :)
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